dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
