i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
Randomize
