Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Randomize
