**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
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