normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Randomize
