haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
i think i have herpe
just one?
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
