people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
