You're earring is so big in my mouth
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
Randomize
