I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
Randomize
