I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
The woman at walgreens tried to sell me clearance condoms with my fake eyelashes. Does it look like I get laid?
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
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