Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
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