We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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