Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
Randomize
