Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
You may now shotgun with the bride
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize