Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
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there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
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My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
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