That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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