Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
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