some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
