Non-Jews are for practice
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
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