All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Randomize
