What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
did you just send me my own nude
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
Randomize