Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
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