So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
