I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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