If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
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