I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
Randomize
