to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
Randomize
