its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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