i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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