Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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