Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

(712): View more from Iowa

Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.

Fav 10 1887 845
share tweet
(301): View more from Maryland

Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.

Fav 30 4114 1087
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(315): View more from New York

the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.

Fav 19 5901 1033
share tweet
(586): View more from Michigan

May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.

Fav 18 1065 5794
share tweet
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Read it at the TFLN blog
(941): View more from Florida

Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.

Fav 11 1264 4487
share tweet
(+44): View more from United Kingdom

Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.

Fav 22 1392 4694
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(336): View more from North Carolina

All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...

(1-336): View more from North Carolina

Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!

Fav 3 1657 777
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(619): View more from California

Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.

Fav 0 1119 610
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(219): View more from Indiana

So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.

Fav 1 80 8
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT