Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
Your message has been received by an unknown user. Picture verification required.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
Randomize
