i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
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