You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
