i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
