Your face is a jimmy john
OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
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