I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
Randomize
