I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
Randomize
