I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
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