I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
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