i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
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