Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Randomize
