okay pat passed out under dana's car
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
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