Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
