Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(360): View more from Washington

she smelled like a LAN party

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.

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(818): View more from California

Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.

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(773): View more from Illinois

Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.

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(555): View more from

After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.

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(201): View more from New Jersey

He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.

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(205): View more from Alabama

you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone

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(218): View more from Minnesota

Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!

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