To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
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