Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Randomize
