her vagine was all disorganized.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
