u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
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