Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
