apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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